Today is International Day of Peace.
I must admit that I did not feel very peaceful much of the day.
Rushing out of the house in the morning.
At my mom’s my car broke down: a hose that my husband and BIL had temporarily fixed burst, leaking fluid all over. I was angry, mainly at myself for not insisting that we take the car in to complete the repair job. Furious, actually. I had to take my mom’s car to work, and once there, realized that I was still wearing my Ergo, something she usually needs to put baby to sleep.
At work I realized today that my current load is overwhelming. I am frustrated that I didn’t push to get admin support in place BEFORE the year started. Instead, I’ve been doing ALL the start-up practical work that I should have passed on to someone else. Once we hire someone, there will already be a lot less work. And in everything I’m doing I barely have time to tackle the most important part of my job, case work. When?! So many trainings, meetings, letters, plans, coordination … and then website updates, finance forms, and on and on.
That is about when I realized it’s International Peace Day. The irony struck me. Nonetheless, in honour of this blog, I felt bound to try and focus on the peace for the rest of the day.
Then a surprise phone call from a Vancouver colleague. He is high up consultanty with the university and I replied to a CC suggesting we connect to talk about my office’s work here. Didn’t expect a reply. But he called. And suggested he, his wife and baby take me out to lunch on Friday. Um … why … okay. He was just so friendly and I was so off-guard. I warned him my daughter is a messy eater. He claims that their son is as well. We shall see. It might be delightful but in the moment it felt mainly like stress.
Over lunch I rushed back to mom’s the meet the tow truck. Which was a beautiful break in the day as my girlie had just woken up and nursed (yay!). And while I was stressed about 2 afternoon meetings, they actually went amazingly well. First with a group of students who want to get involved and initiate a project this year; second with some colleagues who are amazing collaborators and we came up with some practical ideas to move things forward.
The day ended long after husband picked us up from mom’s in the repaired car; then home with an active baby; then bath, play, nurse and sleep. But I had a break in the middle for a shower while husband played with her. And now it’s before 10 and I’m nearly done all vital work for the day and actually, what was I so stressed about? I do great work, I have a wonderful family, and everything will work out. I will keep getting things done and if it doesn’t get done, life will go on.
Peace. A choice. A state of mind. A conscious reaction to what we encounter.