Awake

It’s 4:27 in the morning and I”m awake. I woke up more like 3:45 and have been trying to get myself to sleep again, but no good. Sleep is sometimes a bit dull – close my eyes, lie there doing nothing – while being awake I can read, surf the internet, have something to drink (ooh, tea sounds good!).
Why awake? Well, pregnancy hormones seem to wake me up early in the morning. Not every morning, but often enough to be noticeable compared to my pre-pregnant state. Also, last night (nearly at the end of my second week of mat leave) after accomplishing quite a few tasks on my first to-do list, I consolidated two lists (general to-do and baby-prep to-do) into one list, and drat, it’s about the same length as that first list!). I think the amount that we want to, need to, have to and would like to do before baby is longer than anticipated, and I think my brain is in “go” mode. It wouldn’t let me sleep, because I could wake up and get some of these done!! I’m 35.5 weeks pregnant, which means that in a week and a half I’ll be in the “due zone” – baby could realistically come at any time after that, though it’s more likely s/he’ll come some time after 40 weeks, as most first babies are on the later side. A week and a half to get ready … okay, calm down and breathe.

For the record, in the midst of “doing” I’m making time for exercise (never enough, but some), Pink Kit birth prep (more on that later) and naps. That I’m doing these things almost daily feels great, especially as I know they’re not things you can cram (even though, yes, I’m cramming a bit in this mat leave period). Nonetheless, I’m doing them consistently and my mind and body are working their way towards being ready. Though birth is still a bit much for me to grasp, and several details of post-birth care (specifically: where will baby sleep? and how will we diaper for the first month?) are not really clear in my mind.

So maybe for tonight, as I’m awake, I’ll make some tea, maybe work on a few computer files (our birth announcement email list perhaps?), read a bit, and get back to bed when my mind and body slow down again. More time tomorrow to do. And one more week of doing (oh yes … and being … amazing how challenging that idea is) will have me feeling somewhere approaching maybe ready.

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