3 Things

1. Today, walking baby (2 hours of walking but not a hint of a nap!) I literally felt a weight lift off my shoulders as I remembered that I have paid off my student loans and have no personal debt. I feel so much more free. A world of possibilities feels like it’s opened up. Clearing up unfinished business, decluttering our house, getting focused on what to do with that house, all leave me feeling more and more energized and positive about building the future for our family that we want.
2. Today, officially and completely, baby walked! She’s done steps here and there to date, but maybe only 4 or 5 at a time. Today she walked feet and feet, up and down hallways; walked, turned, kept walking. She can do it! It’s so beautiful!

3. Today, those steps were taken in a friend’s home. We went to an open house at a newly completed home. Lots of people, old and new to us. The home is lovely, clutter free and simply decorated, looking like a gorgeous showhome. It isn’t completely what husband and I want for ourselves, but we love looking at places and discussing what we like and would do differently.
Like: the wide hardwood hand-chiseled floors. The open space. The lack of clutter. The bedrooms. The big kitchen. The central fireplace. The raised/sunken tub and massive shower.
Would do differently: smaller (this place was maybe 5000 square feet on 3 floors). A central hub of the living, dining room and kitchen with continuous flow between. A contained but visible kids’ play area off the kitchen. More of a cozy, sit around in a circle and talk and play games-feeling living room. Bookshelves. A more decked-out laundry room.

In general, it was a wonderful-feeling space to be in. And baby looooved the stairs and obviously loved the open hallways and landings as they inspired her to walk. The extra bedrooms for guests felt great and welcoming. The joy of walking through beautiful space reminded me that my ideal home is probably bigger than I’ve been admitting: maybe it really is more of a 1500 – 2000 square foot home (okay, or even bigger). Practicalities, though, make me crave smaller: build cost/materials; heating costs; cleaning time; and the simple frustration of taking so much time to walk back and forth across a space to watch baby, get things I need, check on dinner. Bigger takes more time in lots of ways, and I don’t love that.

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