When I stop and enumerate all the things I feel guilty about, I feel … well … kind of guilty! It’s quite ridiculous the long and often contradictory list of items that I let myself feel badly about on a regular basis.
Tonight I did my best to let go of some of these. After work, my daughter didn’t nurse much. She didn’t eat much. Oh well! She’s alive and my milk supply can handle a few hours in between.
On the drive home I decided to swing by the La Leche League meeting rather than head straight home. I almost chickened out, even once I got there, because I knew baby was tired. Guilt, guilt … bad mom keeping her baby awake. But, I went anyways. She looooved seeing all the other babies and little kids. She looked and pointed and grunted and said “bebe.” Amusing, because another big thing I feel guilty about is not getting her around other kids enough.
I let myself enjoy the meeting, let her get something from her outing, and decided I was okay with missing her bedtime (a bedtime that we’ve barely established anyways) because there are other important things too.
That’s it. Lightening up on a bit of guilt. Enough for me for today.