So Proud

I’m so proud of my little sister! She just had her beautiful baby on Sunday. And I’m so glad for my brother in law, who was such a great support for her. I’ve been thinking a lot about childbirth over the last 8 months, but having someone so close to me give birth changes my perspective on it. I feel more aware than ever of how intense an experience it is, how challenging to go through – but you go through it, and everyone does, and you survive it, and then you have your baby. But still – I felt almost guilty for not being there with her, supporting her, taking on some of the challenge and pain of birth. And at the same time, I wasn’t and couldn’t and she was clearly up to the task, supported by a wonderful team (husband, midwife, doula), not to mention love and support and prayers from friends and family.
Feeling connected to birth in this real way also motivates me significantly to get myself in shape and ready for birth. I honestly can’t, at this point, fathom giving birth and having the strength to do it. And I do believe it’s one of those things you can’t imagine, you just do. Nonetheless, I’m quite determined to use these last 4 – 8 weeks to get my body, mind and spirit as ready as I can for the process. Breathing exercises and kegels in the morning, walking every day, yoga, the Pink Kit work with M, and whatever else is needed. And then in the time in between, getting the baby things ready, the house in shape, on and on.

For today – my first day of mat leave – I took my time to relax, read and eat this morning (along with a couple cups of raspberry leave & nettle tea), did some breathing and stretching, and am now heading out on errands – blueberries, Value Village shopping, and assorted others. Oh the freedom of leave!

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